what my heart wants to say

tomorrow i need to..

mynameisyuyu — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 17:16:16 +0000

1) download all attached documents (interview and certificate replacement – MARA & FHSS)

i'm in a mess too..you just didn't know because you didn't bother to ask

2) complete all of the forms

3) get the registrar to certify the certificate replacement forms

4) make copies of all the certificates

5) get the copies certified

6) bind the certified copies

7) check FHSS reply – if the certified certificate replacement form can be emailed

8) courier it if it cannot be emailed

9) check for application status

10) confirm transportation and accommodation for the interview

11) finish everything not later than tomorrow

12) i swear i’d reward myself afterwards

Tagged: list, loads

of not being independent..yet..

mynameisyuyu — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 03:33:50 +0000

haha..that's technically how i feel like doing for stressing out

it’s hasn’t been a month yet from my graduation date but to count from when i finished my practical, i have been jobless for three months now..and everyone around me has been asking either – where do i get posted or when will i start working..and some concerned lot were asking – when will i get married..

it’s been hard on me, trust me..because i finished my degree at the age of 24, when most of my friends of the same age have been working for at least a year and have been earning quite a stable income..and at the age of 25 (by year, but not quite yet..haha) i’m still waiting for the job to “come” to me..if i was given more options, i would’ve gone for interviews from day one after i completed my practical..too bad, i can’t have the luxury of having that as one of the options..

and on the sponsorship behalf, they are still taking their time to arrange for our interviews – selecting panels and sorting out the dates for everyone of us..they’ll be interviewing those math and sciences graduates too and since they’ll be interviewing the local graduates as well, i’ll just excuse them for needing a long time to set everything up..and for the time being, i’ll just constantly get in touch with them to see if they are making any important announcement..they’re just incompetent in passing the news around that we have to look for the news ourselves..

so yea, such delays have been giving quite a huge effects on our lives..it seems like we need to start a bit later in life and we have to prolong our dependency towards the guardians..it feels bad that it’s not only affecting our life personally, but it also affects the people we live with..and some big decisions in life has to be put on hold because we lack financial stability..

but yea, i’m still very grateful that i have some very supportive family and friends around..they wouldn’t mind treating me some lunch or dinner if we’re to go out but i never feel good receiving, without knowing when i can return the favour back..

but anyway, i’m in a dire need to keep being positive..i need to keep believing that the longer i have to wait, the bigger the reward i’ll be getting..and i’m praying hard for God to bless me with patience, plenty of it so i can endure all the challenges coming my way..and i hope the people around me would be patient too..i’ll start slow, and i bet it’s gonna be a slow start..i’ve never give in to anything before but this is beyond what i can control..

Tagged: challenges, employment, independent, interview, job, patience, teaching

what’s your favourite colour..?

mynameisyuyu — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 16:56:05 +0000

my best friend is counting days to her big wedding day and she has been busy with all the preparations that need to be done..and of course, among the things she has to think about – pelamin, theme, dresses, the bed etc..and everything involves colours..so she decides that she will be wearing peachy pink and all of us will be wearing pink..

and it so happened that i went to browse for thai silk with another friend and her sister at one of the textile malls (my friends were starting up their fashion lines) and while browsing for the targeted items, i stumbled upon a rack full of satin silk..and upon touching the cloth, i went all excited seeing all the different colours..

so my friend and i started to choose our favourites and we even planned to ask begum (yes, begum is the one who’s getting married real soon!) to change her colour preferences..haha..but we couldn’t make our minds though as to which colour was the most favourable..well my friend chose hers, but i just couldn’t settle with one..i wanted to have all of them!

and then something crossed my mind – i’ve never had a colour preferences..i mean, i’ll go for the most beautiful to my eyes, so whatever colour it comes with, if i like everything about it – design, texture, detailing, whatever etc etc etc, i’ll take it and put it on..

alright let’s browse together -

this dress comes in pink, with orient detailing carefully sewn to a contemporary design featuring the cute ribbon belt..so pink looks pretty too, right..?who doesn't want to look like a princess..

and this red dress looks appealing too especially to those who's blessed with a petite structure..and that black ribbon sort of give a life to the plain, red background..

and who says earth tone doesn't glow..?the silvery touch to the deeply-toned grey makes this dress looks elegant..and that wavy effect, that might be the kind of vibe you'll need if you're attending any event nearing windy autumn..

would you still refuse emerald green now..?

and yes, they have plenty more tones of the same colour..i don't really favour the design of this simple dress but the colour looks beautiful..if one is to take the same colour on a different fabric, say silk, it could have been the prettiest colour on any given occassion..

and who would not fall for this oceanic, turqoise blue..?

now do you get what i mean..?and do you understand why can’t i decide for one particular, highly favourable colour..?because it has to depend on the fabric, the design, the detailing the whatever other factors i could think of when i’m buying any piece..

*facepalm*

i can’t decide..i’ll let my partner decide according to his liking when our time comes..may be i’d just need to be grateful i won’t have any problem putting on any colours..la la la..haha..keep the tomatoes to yourself..red will only make me glow

p/s dear boyfriend..you went to bed when you’re so mad at me *puppy eyes* i’m feeling sorry for you just because you’ll add another wrinkle line on your face or on your eyes

p/s/s haha alright i’m sorry..gee~

Tagged: blue, colour, design, dress, green, grey, pink, red, textile

the clock is stuck on thoughts of you and me..

mynameisyuyu — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 03:10:14 +0000

*crossing my fingers*

Tagged: missing you

that horror movie they made me watch..

mynameisyuyu — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 14:56:41 +0000

if you’re to take me to an horror movie, just make sure i don’t know what movie you were buying for me..keep the purchase information with you, including the movie passes..and i won’t bother looking at which cinema i’m going or what movie will be played in that hall..

so my friends were planning to watch the underworld – only to find out it’s not under the “now showing” list..but since everyone has been looking forward for a movie, so they purchased the awakening instead..and i wasn’t paying attention to the title when they mentioned it to me, because i won’t be watching the underworld anyway..so on the basis of “whatever”, i tagged along anyway..

when we were queuing to buy popcorn, i saw the poster of that particular movie..and the tagline, sort of, read as this – sometimes dead does not mean gone..i turned to my friends – what movie did you just buy..?and they went like – the trailers are the best compared to the rest of the other movies (that we haven’t watched)..

: read the tagline

and helplessly i walked into the screening hall, trying to convince myself that the movie wouldn’t be as spooky because it didn’t sound as popularly recommended..

the introduction convinced me that it should be something scientific..as influenza was mentioned to be the reason of death at that period..and the main lead was also looking for scientific explanations for the alleged paranormal activities..

and just a few minutes after that i was shocked with the suspense and thrilled with the effects..i sure wouldn’t want to admit i was the one screaming and accidentally swore to the plot..and no, i wasn’t the only one, but my friends told me i was the loudest..of course! i didn’t cheat my eyes by not watching it..i practically surrendered to the surprises T_T i was so inexperienced i didn’t know the ghost was coming with the heavy opera musical background! i would’ve hidden myself too if i knew..haha..

but yea, i’m never a fan of an horror movie..but to this one, it’s a good choice if you’ve watched all the other box office movies see if you find the turn of the story was funny near the climax..here’s the trailer if you’re interested -

Tagged: horror movie, paranormal activity, the awakening, underworld

my first day of school..

mynameisyuyu — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 17:29:37 +0000

schools are reopening, yes..?and now i really wish i could pack my stuff, and go back to school..counting the baju kurung i have, carefully iron each one of them, fold and place them carefully on hangers..and make sure mom doesn’t pack them in the luggage bag – they’ll end up crinkled and i’ll need to re-iron them again at school..and no! i’ll make sure i wont be bringing any luggage bag to the hostel because practically there’s no proper place that’s “legal” for us to place the luggage..so any bag that’s foldable, i’ll make sure i have one for the clothes..

oh! one week before that – stationery shopping..i had no idea what happened to the stationery from the previous year..and files, books..they all need to be shiny and fancy..

the girls would love the first day of school – so yay! they could see their eye candies or look for one..

i remembered my first day of form 2..my friends were all excited thinking they’ll be having juniors in a few days time..but not for me, i wished form 1 never ended..i wished that f5 senior who’s been so kind to me would still be there..and i wouldn’t have to deal with the now f4 senior who’s been so keen at me, in a freaky kind of ways..

but yea, i managed to keep myself busy and when the juniors came, i joined the girls in their mission to woo for cute juniors..haha..as a spectator i mean..

alright, now i’ve strayed..but yea, new year meant new form, new subjects, new uniforms, new experiences..life was really rainbows and butterflies..we really looked forward to grow up and becoming the seniors..

and i remember, everyone would wake up early on the first day of school..dewan makan would be filled unusually..we’d be in the classroom even before 6:50am..walking in the cold dew, breathing the smell of the trees..and i wished i cherished sunrise as much back then..because that’s one of the best place to catch sunrise i’ve ever been to..

and that prep night would be the noisiest..we’ll be sharing things we’ve got from the holidays..and that first prep, it’ll still be awkward for the guys to talk to the girls..

i miss school..happy new year all

Tagged: bags, books, friends, new year, school, stationery, uniform

that time i treasured..

mynameisyuyu — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 06:38:59 +0000

so yeah, i’ve been quiet for a couple of weeks..and the reasons being – i was enjoying my every second in wellington nah..i went there for the graduation ceremony and thinking that it might be the last time for me to be there so i treasured my time really carefully..and seriously, it’s such a lovely place..always is..

it’s been 6 months since i left so there’s quite a lot to catch up..and the first thing i caught was the newly refurbished international arrival hall..not really a hall but they have this new and shiny ramp..haha..but at that moment, i stopped myself from counting the new things..they made me feel as if i’m in a strange land..not good, not good

a lot have happened within that six months so that getaway was highly deserving for me..i took it as a vacation..and counting again, my biology really needed a vacation after every six months..so thank you for that trip, i’m feeling great again

so alhamdulillah, finally i’ve graduated and i had the people i love around when it was happening..i really couldn’t ask for more..thank you here are some photos i snapped on my way back home..and the cat i’ve been missing! ♥

this fat cat is still alive..i wonder what his real age is..

: a few hours after sunrise, and this is 3600ft above the sea level..yes you can still see the mountains..and the coulds are so low..i love how the rays give colours to the clouds..

: here’s a closer look at the valleys of the mountains..and there’s still rays! i wasn’t sitting at the window seat but all seats are empty where i was seated so i was free to move around..too bad i was at the front-est..i couldn’t lift up the divider to lay down and sleep

that's sydney, before touching down..minus two hours from wellington..

: i didn’t pay attention all these while..now only i realised it’s surrounded by water..river or sea, i’m pretty uncertain

: from sydney i had a stop over in adelaide..dropping their passengers and taking more to be brought to singapore..and unfortunately a one hour drop off was delayed for 3 hours..because one of the pilots are ill, and they needed to find a replacement..i saw two pilots and co pilots before departing from sydney..i wonder if they really needed 2 pilots to fly A330..way to go Qantas..and this was the cafe, the airline was offering a $10 drink voucher for the delay..and adelaide airport was small..not much to do there..

: last but not least, the dinner menu offered on QF flights..well, i had a different MOML..so yea, just a guide for those who needs it..and to be honest, the food aren’t so bad and the flight was calm all the way from wellington to singapore! the first flights i could sleep well w’out having to wake up due to nasty turbulence..phew~

Tagged: airports, clouds, graduation, in flight meal, New Zealand, qantas, sydney, transits, vacation

i’m talking about sexual relationship..

mynameisyuyu — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 17:06:02 +0000

here’s one or two things i picked up from the long and serious conversation i had with a dear friend..women just can’t involve in a sexual relationship without a strong emotional attachment..unless it’s their profession..

may be this issue is context specific – i’m talking about the women from the east, where religion and traditions play an important role in their socialization and in turn, shapes the kind of romantic relationship they might choose..to them, and being one of them, if you’re to ask “would you mind the break up if you’ve had a sexual relationship?” i’m sure most of them including me will say “yes, we’ll seriously mind and we’ll have a hard time to get over it..that is if we can ever do it”

well to think about it again, it wouldn’t only be the people from the east who would think of it that way..as long as they’re women, they’d have a strong emotional connection with sexual relationship..i don’t really have a literature to cite here but go watch friends with benefits, you’ll get my point..nevermind where they come from, they’d get sensitive and emotionally attached especially when it involves sexual relationship..

time changes and the new generations are receiving a lot of exposure especially from the media..so they watch the cheesy korean drama for a start and the dreamy and romantic images trigger their desire into having such a romantic relationship..and when they have something similar or quite close to it, they start to desiring something more “fun” like a sexual relationship..and they have plenty of available resources to help them to be good at that..(p/s no i’m not blaming the korean drama nor it’s the sole reason that could spark desires)..

and, for some, they’d just go for the “fun” parts undermining the cultural consequences..it might occur to them things like “would i regret it? does he deserve this?” but at that moment, they think they can bear the consequences..

but when they eventually find the time to think about all the things they have done, they might even regret their kisses – for realising that their partner might not be the one they’d like to live with..or finding uncertainties in their relationship (the partner might not be ready) or finding out the true colour of their partner (their middle name is cassanova without you realizing it)..

regretting, would you..?

i might sound conservative, may be i am..but no matter how much civilisation has changed us, there’s value in each relationship, especially in sexual relationship..especially with eastern people, they’d still find themselves torn between desires and culture..if you reach that stage in a relationship, it’s crucial to appreciate and value the favour highly..and it has to be visible if not audible, outside of the bed too..

Tagged: culture, east, relationship, sexual, values, women

it’s for him..

mynameisyuyu — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 16:40:04 +0000

so they say it’s not gonna be easy..
and you’ve seen people proving to you it’s hard..
it seems to you as if you’ve already known your destiny too..
but hey,
the very basic creation of a human being is made nonidentical..
it should convince you enough that you’ve different path to walk on..
it’ll scare you, drain out energy off your system..
i couldn’t change that even if i consistently scream to you not to freak out..
but for once, you really need to keep believing you’ll get through this..
i see efforts i see determinations i couldn’t see reasons for you to screw it..
*hugs*
you have my prayer with you..
nevermind what the outcomes would be,
you’d still have the same person standing behind you, for you to fall back on..
good luck sayang

Tagged: faith, spoken poetry

it’s another december..

mynameisyuyu — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 17:18:00 +0000

how time flies, it’s december again..last december i was attending the summer school up in karori and teaching hayden the right way to go back home from that campus..then, instead of enjoying the summer in wellington i opted to come home not knowing that december would be so meaningful..so, welcome again december

exaggerated, of course :p

Tagged: december, love