there are a lot of things i want to do before i would think of getting married and settling down..they are the typical things people would want to do like finishing a degree, work and become a post graduate student may be..
i don’t have anything against marriage and i see it as a beautiful institution..but with marriage, comes a big responsibility for both parties..
given a situation, where i’m now married and have a kid, and for some work-related issues, i have to migrate to Istanbul..so now i would need to get Mr. Husband to either get a placement in Istanbul, or quit his job and try to find something good in Istanbul or stay in Malaysia and maintain a long distance relationship..
as for the kid, Mr. Husband & Ms. Wife would need to negotiate what is best for the kid..to go with Mom, or stay with Daddy..or stay with his/her grandparents..
say the parents have to come a conclusion that they all move to Istanbul together, don’t you think the moving process, the settling down process would be easier if there’s only one person moving to that place..?don’t you think it’s easier to manage one person than managing a couple more..?and if opportunity knocks again, it’s the father’s turn to move somewhere else..wouldn’t it be a messier mess..?
and things become more complicated when Ms. Wife is offered to pursue her studies as the work demands for expertise in that particular area..and the company would sponsor the studies only if Ms. Wife studies in Istanbul..
the moving scenes would be a nightmare to that kid..her rights for proper growth are abused eventhough the parents don’t plan for such turns in life..
and don’t make me start about the rest of the family members that are left in Malaysia..
let’s change the story for a bit..
say i don’t get married after finishing my study because i want to work, i want to make my parents happy, travel the world, do some charity works across the globe, further my studies and get married very late which’s around 45 year-old..
at that stage, it would be risky for me to get pregnant..and say if i successfully give birth to the first born when i’m 47, and 2nd born at the age 49, would i have enough energy to raise the kids..?would i still be there to see their achievements when they’re in their thirties..?am i capable to enjoy rough play time with my kids..?
i’m very independent, and i have goals in life..but at the same time i don’t want marriage to curb my independence, kids to become excessive baggage or cultural expectations to stop me from achieving my goals in life..
Dear God, provide me with guides and help ease things for me..amin